New Year

As the New Year approaches, it is time to reflect on the past and to plan the future.

This year has been full of changes for me.  At first, I did not want to accept the changes and made my life more difficult than it needed to be.  Once I accepted the changes, life got a lot more enjoyable.  I realise now, that my life had to change if I wanted to achieve my dreams.  I guess I was hoping I could achieve my dreams without changing the way I live.  The old adage if you alway do what you always did you will always get what you always got comes to mind.  The changes may have been painful but they were certainly worth while.  My life has changed dramatically and I am so thankful for that.

Part of my changes helped me to really appreciate the family and friends who surround me now.  They helped me through a difficult time and stood by me.  I am truly blessed to have these people in my life.  I enjoy spending time with my family and friends and the laughter and wellbeing associated with their company.

I have grown as a person and have started to work towards my goals and dreams rather than waiting for them to be handed to me on a platter.  I will no longer hang on to anyone else's coattails to get the life that I want (hanging on someone else's coattails didn't work anyway).  I do sometimes worry that I have left my run a bit late then realise that worrying is a part of my past I will leave behind.  I have become more aware of my useless habits and endeavour not to make use of them in my present or future.  It is not always easy but the more I practice positive life choices the easier it becomes.

After spending Christmas Day with family, I realised how truly blessed I really am.  I could not ask for a better family.

The New Year is looming.  I will not make any New Year's Resolutions.  The thing is that I have been enacting my new resolutions during the year, I did not have to wait for a New Year to change.  I will welcome the New Year as a celebration of the past and anticipation for the future.

Happy New Year to everyone!

Just Accept

Many is the time that I have caught myself saying "I don't understand why they would do that" or "What were they thinking" when someone did something that did not make sense to me.  By asking those questions I am doing two things.  One, I am trying to put myself in someone elses shoes, and secondly, I am making a judgement call on someone else's actions based solely on my experiences and perspective.

I will never be able to put myself into someone else's shoes because I have not experienced the things they have experienced and will never be able to copy their thought patterns.  They are unique and so am I.  Also, it is not my place to make judgement calls on the choices other people make.  If I was perfect, maybe, but until that time arises, I have no right to judge others.

I have arrived at a place where I now put effort into understanding myself. Changing thought patterns and improving on choices I have made in the past and regretted.  I strive to acknowledge the good choices I have made and to improve on choices and behaviours that I am not particularly proud of.  This life is about me and no one else.  I need to spend time on me rather than distracting myself with thoughts of improving other people.  I am the only person I can change.

I believe life is about living your own life in your own unique way and allowing others to do the same. 

Everyone needs a sanctuary

It is important that everyone has a sanctuary, a place of safety.  It is a place where you can sit and chill, or a place you can go to when you are feeling down, or a place to ponder a decision you have to make.

My main sanctuary is a room in our house.  We call it the 'quiet room'.  It is a room that houses all our crystals and is used solely for spiritual things.  The vibrations are very calming.  Every morning I go into that room and have my quiet time, being thankful for all that I have and to prepare myself for the coming day.  I also go to that room when I need to have some time out or to rid myself of negative thoughts.  This room enables me to maintain my balance.

I also enjoy nature as a calming influence.  Sitting on the beach watching the surf, or in a harbour watching boats come and go is very soothing.  Sitting in a park or a forest with running water also helps to let my mind wander.  I find water is my relaxant however when we lived in a place with limited water, I found a sanctuary in the red dirt and the night sky. 

No matter where you live, try to find a place you can spend time every day to help you with lifes trials and tribulations.  Find a place you can visit every now and then to go to when you are feeling troubled or to recharge your batteries with different vibrations to top up your feelings of wellbeing.

Everyone has a different idea of what a sanctuary is to them, whatever that may be find it, and enjoy it.

Attitude is everything!

We have the choice to treat life as a challenge or we can treat it as an adventure.  Life is all about learning new things.  No matter what you do, you will continue to learn lessons throughout your lifetime.  Your attitude will make a difference to how easy or difficult it is to learn the lessons.

If you treat life like an adventure, you can wait with anticipation for the next leg in your journey.  If you treat each episode as a way to learn as much about yourself as you can, the journey is so much more fun and, I believe, you will learn so much more.

If you treat life like a challenge and a chore, you are more likely to just get through the drama as quickly as possible.  The trouble with this thinking is that you may not learn everything you need to learn first time around.  The same problem will keep coming back, and more severe each time, until you do learn the lessons you need to learn.  So it takes longer to learn your lessons and you limit your time on moving forward to the next lesson.

When you treat life as an adventure, you have more energy.  You may not get what you thought you wanted but you bounce back quickly because you realise that there is something even better out there to experience.

Make your choice, adventure or challenge?

Count your Blessings

My Mother used to tell me to count my blessings when I was moaning that someone could do something that I was not allowed to do.  I never really gave it much thought as a child but now it is really important to me.

I must admit that I have a tendency to have a poor me attitude.  It is something that comes out every now and then when I least expect it.  I fight it every time it comes back with the art of counting my blessings.

Sometimes it is very hard to find something positive to start counting with.  I always resort to the love of my family and friends.  I have about 5 people who really love me, not the superficial kind of love, but a deep love and they accept me unconditionally no matter what I do.  Now sometimes, I can only really feel that love from one of those five people and I will concentrate on that love as a blessing.  Each day I would list first thing in the morning who or what was a blessing to me and I was very fortunate to have in my life.  Just before I went to bed I would go over my day and find at least one instance of something good happening to me during the day.  Sometimes it was to see a baby smile or to see a perfectly formed flower.  Other times it was the kindness of a loved one or a stranger.  Each day my list would get longer of the good things in my life and the happy moments during the day.  Before long I was appreciative of my life again.

As soon as I start to appreciate my life, so many good things seem to happen and more opportunities open up for me. I am not sure whether all the good things happen because being positive brings about more opportunities or whether my attitude has changed and I recognise the good things happening around me.

So next time you are feeling a little down or things are not going the way you want them to, start counting your blessings.  It works!

You don't have to be poor to be spiritual

I used to believe that you had to be poor to be spiritual.  I think the notion came from my Sunday School lessons and I embraced it with a passion.  Hence, I was happy to be poor.

As I have progressed in life, I have come to realise that money does not make you happy.  Conversely being poor does not make you happy either.

It is very hard to stay connected with your spiritual side while you are constantly worrying how you are going to pay for your next bill or keep a roof over your head.  Lets face it, we live in a material world and money is needed to live in a material world.  We can't all be self sufficient to the extent of not needing money.

I have observed people who have touched my life.  I have met many lovely spiritual people both rich and poor.  They are all just really nice people and the amount of money they have makes no difference to the people they are.  The only thing I have noticed is that the rich people have the means to help people spiritually as well as physically.

As soon as I made up my mind that I no longer needed to be poor to be spiritual, my material world started to change.  Very slowly at first but it is getting better every day.  As the financial pressures disappear, the more I can concentrate on the spiritual and physical side of my life.

Life has a lot of challenges and opportunities for you to grow.  Don't waste them all by conentrating solely on your material life.

Be thankful

I have just finished a year that I wish to never repeat.

My old life collapsed around me and for so long I wanted it back.  I was 'told' you can't move forward while still looking back.  That did not provide much comfort for me at the time.  Now, I have a new life.  I look back at what I have been through and I am thankful for the experience.  A lot of good things came out of the experience.

First and foremost is my spiritual growth.  I have a totally different attitude to my spirituality and I am comfortable with the change.

I gained an insight to how much my husband loves me.  The support he gave me cannot be expressed.  No longer do I take our love for granted.  I also found the most amazing friend whose company is uplifting and most of all - fun!

I would never have discovered how much I enjoy writing.  These blogs are very therapeutic for me.

Money does not make you happy.  Try telling that to someone who has no job, the rent is due, the cupboard is bare and they only have $5 in their pocket.  Lack of money does not make you happy either.  I have learned to appreciate money but not to idolize it or expect it to solve all my problems.

I learned so much about myself, good and not so good.   I know the areas I need to work on and I appreciate my good qualities.

Sometimes we need to go through the hard times to shed the old life and attitudes that are not good for us to be able to make way for the new life that is so much better for us.

This morning I am looking back at my old life and appreciating my new life.  Everyone I meet, personally or on the internet, are really nice people.  To be surrounded by such wonderful people is something to be truly thankful for.

When you are in the middle of a hard time, do not look too far into the future.  Look at getting through an hour or a day.  When you have finished that day, be thankful you made it through.  Just keep putting one foot in front of the other.  One day you will wake up and find that you are in a much better place than you were in before.  Then you too, will be thankful for the hard times that you have been through.

Help the Univese help you.

If you want to win the lottery, you must buy a ticket.  It is the same thing when you ask the Universe for assistance, you must go out and help yourself.

It is okay to ask the Universe for assistance but go out and do the legwork to help yourself achieve the goal you have set.  The more work you do for yourself, the more opportunities the Universe can create for you.

Listen to your intuition and act on what you feel you are being compelled to do, even if it is not a logical step to take.  Sometimes there are steps you need to take before you can achieve your goal.  Look at the opportunities that are presented to you and consider them carefully. You may be presented with an opportunity that you would not have even thought of before but you  find very enjoyable.

Be flexible in your approach to what you want to achieve.  You may start out with one goal and end up achieving another goal that is much more rewarding.  It is good to have a goal but sometimes circumstances change and we change and our goals may change accordingly.

Remember also, don't sacrifice the enjoyment of today waiting for the fulfillment of a goal tomorrow. It is not the achievement of the goal, but the journey that is most rewarding.

Meditation Part Five

Guided Meditation

There are many opportunities for you to participate in a guided meditation.  This is where a person will take you step by step through a series of visualisations.  They may start with breathing exercises and then onto a journey where you can absorb energy and healing.  Guided meditations can be purchased on CDs or you can go to a meditation class.

You may find it easier to meditate with music.  The music can stop thoughts coming into your mind if you concentrate on the music.

Remember, only meditate if you feel safe and comfortable.   There are many different ways to meditate, find the way that suits you best.  The main thing is to incorporate meditation into your routine and will notice very positive results.

Meditation - Part Four

Meditation with Imagery

Once you have mastered your breathing, you may wish to add imagery to your meditation routine.  The imagery can be used to enhance your sense of well being.

You can imagine you are on a fluffy pink cloud and you can feel the softness of that cloud.  You can feel the love of the pink cloud and absorb that love into your body.  You can see or feel that love moving through your entire body filling you with love.

Another scenario is that you imagine yourself in a safe forest.  The plants are all very green and lush.  From the plants you can feel the energy of healing radiating from them.  This energy is touching your body and mind.  You can feel the healing being absorbed by your body and mind.  Concentrate on the green healing energy and how it radiates through your body.

There are many more scenarios that you can use to absorb energy that you require during your day.  The most important thing is that you feel safe and comfortable.  The other important factor is that you leave all your day to day thoughts out of the meditation.

To be continued.....

Meditation - Part Three

How to Meditate.

Sit comfortably.  Uncross your arms, hands, legs and feet.  Now, take a deep breath in through the nose.  Feel the breath fill up your lungs and feel or see the clean air travelling through every part of your body.  Follow it's path until you breath it out the mouth.  Inhale through the nose, now feel or watch the clean air travel through your body, cleaning every part of your body it touches.  Exhale the dirty air through your mouth.  Take another couple of deep breaths until you feel or see the inside of your body being clean.  Then find a normal pattern of breathing, in through the nose, out through the nose. Feel the cool air on your top lip as you breath in and feel the warm air on the top of your lip as you breath out.  Concentrate totally on your breath.

If you have any thoughts come into your head, let them go and concentrate harder on your breath.  Continue concentrating as long as you can on your breathing.

Initially, you may find it a little difficult to concentrate on your breathing for 10 minutes or more, but it does get easier as you practice more.

Tomorrow I will write about another type of meditation but it is wisest to master your breathing meditation first.

To be continued.......

Meditation - Part Two

Where and When to Meditate

First and foremost you need to find a place that you won't be disturbed.  I have known of some people who meditate in the bathroom!  You need to be able to sit comfortably.  One word of caution, do not try to meditate in bed (You will fall asleep, take it from someone who knows).  Finding a place with a nice outlook or near some lovely plants would be perfect.  It is possible to meditate anywhere just so long as you won't be disturbed and you feel comfortable.

If you can't find a place that you wont be disturbed, find a time you won't be disturbed.  I used to get up half an hour before everyone else in the morning and used that time to meditate uninterrupted.  For me, it put me in the right frame of mind to have a really good day.  You can choose to meditate last thing at night.  The main thing is to consistently have a time of day that you put aside to do your meditation.  Meditation should become part of your daily routine.

To be continued.....

Meditation - Part One

Time to Meditate.

As every day life gets busier and busier it has become very important to meditate each day.  Meditation is the key to being able to have balance in your life.  Through meditation you can create for yourself peace, calmness and a sense of well being. You only need about 10 minutes each day to make a difference to your life.  Meditation has now become a part of my morning routine ( you can choose any time that is suitable to you) and my life has become calmer and more manageable.  I would like to share with you how to meditate over the next few days so that you can enhance your life too!

To be continued.....

Duty of care by Psychics

A few years ago, I went to a psychic who told me I should leave my husband.  I was devastated.  I cried all the way home and I cried even harder when I told my husband that the psychic said I should leave him.  My ever practical husband gave me a big hug and asked me " Do you want to leave me?" I replied "No" Then he said "Then what is the problem?"  He basically told me that I did not have to do what the psychic told me to do. If I had listened to the psychic, it would have had a negative effect on my life.

As a medium, I have been asked by clients whether they should leave their partners. After my experience, I now have very strong ideas that no one in the physical or spirit world has the right to tell someone to leave their partner.  This is a decision that has to be made by the individual.  Firstly, they alone know the nature of their relationship and can make an informed decision.  Secondly, they may feel they want to leave their partner but  still need a little more time to make sure they are making the right decision.  Thirdly, once the decision is made, they are personally responsible for the outcome.  Through making their own decision, they have grown as a person and if it does not turn out how they expect, the can't blame someone else for the situation.  On the other hand, if it turns out better than expected they can take all the credit for outcome.

I believe the role of a psychic is to provide the information and tools for the client to be able to make their own decision to move forward.  Offering their clients a different perspective and alternative ways to help them work through their situations.  This way, the client holds the power to shape their own future.  The psychic should encourage empowerment not dependence.

It is about time that psychics took a step back, look at the impact their words have on their client's lives.  Ask themselves whether they would be happy with someone telling their loved ones the things they are telling their clients.  As soon as you accept payment for what you are saying to a client, then you have an obligation to make a positive impact on your client's life not a negative impact.

People also need to take responsibility to be discerning and realise that you don't have to do what a psychic tells you to do.  At the end of the day, be responsible for your own decisions.

That is not my problem

I have found it very hard to distinguish what is my problem and what is someone else's problem.  In my younger days, I would have a friend come to me with a problem.  I would empathise with them and try to understand how they felt and got very caught up in their problem.  The next week, the same friend had resolved their problem and I was still caught up in it and trying to resolve my feelings.  Very simply it was not my problem to take on.

I still find it difficult not to get upset for my loved ones when someone does something against them.  I have started to learn that I can give advice but once that advice is given that is the end of my involvement in their problems. 

Everyone has to learn to make the division between what is their problem and what is someone else's problem.  I am not advocating that you don't care about other people and their problems.  What I am saying is that you don't get emotionally involved in their problem.  You can listen to the person, you can offer alternative options of how they may wish to resolve their problem, then you leave it there.  You have no control over what choices they make to resolve their problem.  If you get emotionally involved and they do not resolve the problem you want them to, it is you who feels frustrated and upset.

I find that the serenity poem is so appropriate.  When I am struggling with a problem, if I step back and work out if I can do anything to change the outcome, I will do it.  If I cannot change the outcome, I can change my attitude to accept the outcome.

Everyone has the opportunity to grow from problems in life, the decision of actions and the consequences of those actions help people mature.  If you fight other people's battles you are doing them a disservice as well as yourself.  They do not have the opportunity to grow stronger and you have used time you could have been using to work on yourself.

Start being a little more discerning as to how you help people.  Don't let their problems become your baggage.

What are Soulmates?

I have seen people in love and they tell me they have found their soulmate.  I have had 'spiritual' people try to explain to me about soul recognition and another part of me in spirit world and frankly I had no idea what they were talking about.

My understanding of soulmate is the popular version used by people in love.  I used to be envious of these people who had found their soulmate and were sure they were going to live happily ever after.  I have since changed my opinion.

No one person is capable of meeting all your needs. Different people in my life meet my different needs.  It is through the diversity of the people that I interact with, that all my needs are met.  Also, it is that diversity of other people in my life that makes me more interesting to those closest to me.  I dont need my partner to be all things to me and to be constantly by my side.  We do not need to be joined at the hip to be happy.

Take a look around you and see the part that people play in your life.  The person you have the deep and meaningful conversations is probably different to the one you go out and have fun with.  The one who you go dancing with is probably different to the one who you play chess with. 

We are each unique individuals, shaped by circumstances, experiences and nature.  There is no other person just like you.  You need to be happy with who you are.  Your thoughts are shaped by your experiences and the people that surround you.  The more people you meet and talk to, the more interesting you become to yourself and others. 

To be happy you do not need an individual to do this for you. You do not need to find a soulmate. Do not make your happiness and who you are be dependant on your partner. You need to be happy with the person you are and the interests you follow first and foremost.  Then when you have made sure you have met your needs then you can share who you are with a partner.

This is my life

This is my life.  I make my own choices and decisions.  I am totally responsible for every emotion I feel, every situation I have been in and every outcome that has occurred during my lifetime.

I do not know if it is the age we are living in or the culture that has evolved but I constantly hear people blaming others for the predictaments they find themselves in.  Quite frankly, I find the victim mentality very tiresome.

We all have to make our own choices and live with the consequences.  Sometimes life delivers a nasty blow but it is entirely up to you how to deal with the situation.  The outcome is your responsibility.  You can't blame others for the way your life ends up.  They may have made bad choices that did have an impact on your life but your reactions to the situation is your responsibility. 

Some people abdicate responsibility for making a choice or decision and let someone else make their decisions for them be it a psychic, partner or parent etc.  By letting someone else make a decision for you, you have made a choice to let someone else run your life.  You are still responsible for the outcome because you made a passive choice not to do anything.

We do not always have control of what hand life deals us, but we do have control of our reactions.  Next time something unexpected happens to you, don't go into the victim mode, take a look at the situation and find the positives in it.  This is not always easy and it does take practice.

Next time someone tries to make decisions for you, acknowledge that you are allowing them to make the decision or choose to make your own decision.  This may sound harsh but nobody will look after your interests if you are not willing to look after your own interests.  Make your life decisions and actions be important to you.  Take responsibility for yourself and acknowledge the choices you are making.  Also be aware of the results of your choices.

Please, choose to take control of your life and leave those who choose to be victims to their own misery.

Karma is going to get you.

How many times have you heard someone say "Karma is going to get you"?  Every time I hear that phrase I shudder.  Karma is not your personal revenge tool.  Karma is about balance not revenge.

When something bad or unpleasant happens to you, instead of worrying about Karma wreaking havoc on the person who has caused you this pain, concentrate on what lesson you need to learn from this experience.  If we focus more on ourselves and our actions and our lessons rather than some 'nasty person who done me wrong', we are more likely to grow and become better people.

Situations in life are opportunities to learn how to improve ourselves.  We go through our frantic day to day lives and usually don't have time to concentrate on ourselves.  Who we are, what we stand for.  Our time is spent reacting to situations.  When a situation puts a spanner in the works for us the first thing we want to do is blame someone one else for our misfortunes.  Then we have a choice.  We can say "Karma is going to get you" and feel comforted knowing that someone else is going to feel pain and you carry on your merry way.  The alternative is a much harder but a much more rewarding path.  You can look at the situation and ask yourself some hard questions.  "Did my actions contribute to this situation arising?" "Is there something I can learn from this experience?"  "Have I put too much importance on my car/job/house?" "How can I stop this situation developing again?" 

Sometimes it is very hard to look objectively at a situation and to accept responsibility for what has happened.  You sometimes need to give yourself some time to heal before you can really look at a situation and learn some lessons from it.  Put it away for a little while but you must come back to it and analyze what you need to learn from the situation.  This can sometimes be very painful but if you can learn that you can change your behaviour to stop this from happening again, surely it is worth it.

So often I see people (myself included) spending time and energy worrying about what other people are doing and putting judgements on them.  If we put that time and energy concentrating on what we are doing and how our actions affect us and the people around us, I am sure this world would be a lot nicer place to live.